Introduction to Cuckolding
If you’re reading this site for the first time and your husband/wife has just recently began sharing this idea with you, or perhaps it’s a long-lived fantasy only now receiving renewed attention, please continue reading.
Cuckolding takes what is perceived as the largest threat to a marriage and turns it into something that binds a couple closer together.
First, please understand and appreciate that for one spouse to bring this idea up to the other is an expression of love and trust. As skeptical as you might naturally be, I will take it as a positive sign that you are here to learn more.
Second, take it from a man who has been directly involved in this lifestyle as a Dom for over a decade now that done correctly, this lifestyle will bring a couple even closer emotionally than ever before – even for couples who already have a good relationship. Yes, it may sound strange at first that inviting another man into your marriage, and dare I say, inside the wife, will bring you closer, it’s true.
Why / How Cuckolding Isn’t Cheating
In short: Cheating is a violation of trust; cuckolding is an expansion and exploration of trust.
Cheating is so destructive because of the secrecy. Without being involved and aware of what’s going on, the husband is left feeling nothing but fear and potential loss. This is not the case with cuckolding. Husband and wife should share everything regarding this experience. When this is done within a loving, trusting marriage, the husband can focus on the erotic elements of such an adventure with his wife instead of being overwhelmed with anger, fear and doubt.
Wives have a hard time with the idea of sharing so much about their experiences with someone else. Their instinct is to protect their husband from such details, but for several reasons, these detailed exchanges are the key to happy and successful cuckolding.
Things Aren’t Always What They Seem
In our society, religion has imposed behavior upon us which restricts intimacy to married couples. I reject this, obviously, but not necessarily out of disregard for religion but moreso out of respect for our biology which was formed long before religion decided our lives for us.
As I discuss in my article entitled “The Biology of Cuckolding”, as a species, we were wired very differently than we are expected to behave in contemporary society. This is one reason why this lifestyle can appeal to so many. At an instinctive level, polyamory is actually more natural than what we practice today. The odds are actually pretty high that one of you neighbors has or is interested in one or more aspects of cuckolding.
Humans being the complex animals we are, there are also other factors at play. Most of these are mental and emotional components that relate to our basic biology, but are also related to social norms, taboos and expressions of dominance and submission (which are a natural part of the fabric of human existence).
It’s a Win-Win situation.
Most of the couples I’ve been involved with or coached loved each other and were very happy in their relationship, but were missing something. In most cases that was simple sexual fulfillment. It could be the husband has a small penis, lacks stamina or is simply not the assertive personality their wife fantasizes about giving herself to. Cuckolding allows this couple to experience greater sexual satisfaction while still enjoying the other aspects of their relationship. If you think about it, it’s much easier to find someone sexually compatible than someone compatible to share your life with, making this dynamic a natural fit for many couples who want their love and their sex to be fulfilling.
About The Author
A loving Dom for couples since 1996, Luvr has personally enjoyed introducing and exploring cuckolding and D/s with couples for over a decade. Luvr launched FMSB.org in 1996 as a free community and resource to help educate individuals and couples about erotic cuckold marriages. FMSB.org became CuckoldMarriage.info in 2011.
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Love the picture where the man obviously takes over the willing wife – both smiling at the cuckold with the camera…gimme more!
my husband want me to be the subject of the “win-win” situation. Thank you for the site and i look forward to chatting with you!!!
hi juliet….so how do u plan to cuckold ur husband? :>
So interesting??????? Why is this different than other sharing?
The primary differences between cuckolding and other forms of sharing (swinging or an open marriage) is that cuckolding refers to a sharing lifestyle where the husband remains faithful to his wife as she enjoys other men and where the husband’s sexual role is not one of leadership within the marriage. The dynamic varies among couples and can also depend on the other man (or men) involved with the couple. When involved with a Dom, the authority transferred to the wife, by the husband, is also then transferred by her, in many ways, to the Dom, leaving both spouses directly and indirectly submissive to the Dom.
Do you think it’s important to have an actual cuckold contract to set out in clear detail what the rules of the relationship entails?
Cuckolding is based on trust and communication, so any rules or customs you might establish should be as easily adhered to and honored verbally as through a written contract. Where the written contract has value is as a framework to help you walk through the various options and the impacts they will have. This is a very erotic experience as well, speaking as the Dom, to be involved in that process.
what about guys that have no kind of sexual issues like size, stamina, impotence or just general know how, but are kinky enough to want to live this fantasy out.
what would you recommend then?
This lifestyle isn’t at all limited to couples where his performance is an issue. Her being satisfied with your sexlife doesn’t mean she can’t enjoy better. In fact, just enjoying someone other than her husband can be a huge thrill because of the kink of it being someone else inside her.
Most often, cuckolding is about roles; the husband wants to share his wife and not be the decision maker. Most often he desires she be more assertive and choose a lover for herself, for example, but for many wives, this is a difficult role if they are a submissive personality.
Sharing isn’t limited to submissive-leaning husband’s though. If you are the dominant partner in your marriage, you can also share her as a Dom where you are the one to choose who she pleasures and how.
I’ve know more cuckolds of average (or better) size/stamina than I have the ‘stereotypical’ cuckold with a small penis.
On my second marriage to a wonderful and very attractive young woman ten years younger than myself I discovered I was extremely aroused with the idea of her having sex with another man. I had no problem with size, stamina or performance; I just wanted to see her aroused and satisfied by another man. Today, after nine years I can honestly state, “there is nothing more sexually excitng than to see another man exciting her as he has intercourse with her.” While I have no sexual interest in other women, I enjoy other men satisfying her.
My wife was reluctant and refused my suggestions initially, but after several years, my persistence and an opportunity one evening at an alternative night club , she succumbed to another man while I was talking with his wife. I only observed their coupling after they had almost completed the sexual act. My wife was flushed, excited and embarrassed, but we discussed it later at home and she admitted she had enjoyed it tremendously. Since that time we have sought eleigible, well-endowed men for her and I work to keep both of them happy.
That’s a great story, Charlie – shows other couples that being persistent can pay off.
It also makes a point I’ve made before: the desire for husbands to see their wives enjoy other sexual partners isn’t limited to the husbands who are unable to pleasure their wives adequately. The analogy I use is that we all pretty much have a favorite flavor of ice cream, but it certainly doesn’t mean we don’t enjoy a few scoops of many others.
The wife of a cuckold is given a choice. And from time to time she might take that choice. A cuckold is a man who offers his wife a choice because reality must prevail. He knows that she needs more than he can provide. He knows he cannot meet the burden. So introducing his wife to cuckolding makes complete sense, in spite of the voice in his head saying no. He introduces her to choice because without choice for her, their marriage has nothing. With choice for her, with another man offering her satisfaction, their marraige is reborn with hope. A cuckold deeply loves his wife. And he should appreciate the man who offers satisfaction to his wife. Any feelings of jealousy and humiliation are there for the most honorable cause.
I think my wife is spoiled by me in allowing her to cuckold me and my reward is her sexual happiness. Not that I can’t satisfy her myself, but I enjoy spoiling her by giving her something I don’t have. I’m properly endowed, almost eight inches, but our cuckold relationship has always been JJ with a well endowed black man and two of them have been ten inches and four times as thick as I am while one of them is eleven inches, Seeing and hearing her with these friends is truly a tingling experience. I’m not sure I could tolerate it if we had not been members of an ‘alternative nightclub’ (an off-premise swinger’s club) for three years and an actual swinger’s club for one year. While we didn’t swing except on one occasion, we did everything but with a number of couples. We decided to find men for her and the first time this occurred was by accident with a black friend we ran into who we’d known at our old club. Janet has five black paramours she sees from time to time. I am not effeminate and I’m damn sure not humiliated and if anyone tried to control my orgasms they would be displeased by my response.
I am intrigued by this site and looking for a cuckhold realtionship and leading to a marraige
I fail to see how a couple who is not married can establish a cuckold relationship. With a single male and a single female the female lacks any reason to cuckold the male. He is just a sucker and wimp for other males and the odd man out. In a husband/wife relationship it’s an entirely different ball game…
Totally wrong! I have had 2 extremely long relationships, (one over 20 yrs) Every bit as commited as marriage. It is all in the relationship and the mind set of the couple, little to do with marriage and your bit of paper!
As tanandy said, the requirement is commitment, not a piece of paper. Having said that, a couple is more likely to have that commitment and to have more things to create a bond if they are married, but cuckolding in a long-term, committed relationship will work just fine.
Now that the number of couples that opt for commitment without the ceremonial/legal cover is increasing dramatically, I think we’ll see a lot more cuckolding of unmarried men. After all, it is the sexual relationship that is in play, not the legal one.
Instead of a marriage ending; the cuckold lifestyle offers a new begining.
What is not right about a man making sure his wife is pleased. Maybe the husband could not please her from the begining, or, can no longer please her.
The marriage need not be over. Other men have actually helped me with my wife. And I want her to feel real pleasure. And so I have watched and I have waited.